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FML... Bad Boys and Employment (or lack thereof)

I have so much on my mind lately I feel like I am drowning in my own thoughts. I am in a constant state of thinking... which in my case can only mean one thing. I am most likely losing that last little grasp I had on sanity.

Now, don't get me wrong. I am not having a bottle of wine a night in honour of my own personal pity party (although, even at 11 am as I am writing this, that doesn't sound like a bad idea). I guess, technically, I could hold a soirèe celebrating my internal turmoil, but who the hell wants to open that can of worms?! I'll stick with my internalisation any day rather than turning into one of those Facebook status updater types who have the need to tell the masses when they've stubbed their toe, have a zit, or are purposely vague in their eternal sadness quotations, followed, of course, by the ever popular FML. Really? Is your life ending because you're having a bad hair day? FML should be reserved for things like; oh my god my only friend in the world, Chester, who happened to be a goldfish, died because I was playing Dungeons & Dragons for three days straight while drinking Red Bull and I forgot to feed him. Then by all means, please, F your L. Repeatedly.

No, I won't turn to social media to become my therapist. I'll leave those deep rooted issues buried where they belong. But, I do apologize, I am going to divulge those psychological disturbances that sit precariously on the edge of my mental stability.

Firstly, I have become slightly, dare I say, addicted to bad boys. To be clear, this all in my head. I am not actively seeking any type of relationship, bad boy or not. In fact the idea of trying to squeeze some egotistical (sorry, guys) male into my thoughts and life does not appeal to me in the slightest. No, I like my bad boys on the screen and bound in a nice cover. (Dirty minded people: "bound in a nice cover" means book, get your minds out of the gutter.)

It started, of course, with my new found love for "mommy porn", Mr. Grey. Then it has spiralled out of control from there. The typical male just has no place in my head any longer. I like them a little scary, Mr. Grey, a little dark, J.R. Ward's Black Dagger Brotherhood Series (and yes, I am slightly embarrassed to admit I find myself attracted to these vampires) and a little dangerous, the on screen hotties that are in my league of bad boys... Jax Teller and the Winchester Boys (Sons of Anarchy and Supernatural).

I am clearing the air right now, I am way too involved in the Sons of Anarchy. I actually had to give my head a shake and myself a little internal talking to after I found myself looking at a real life biker last week like I wanted to take a bite out of him. This was no Jax either. Yuck. I just had had a momentary lapse of vision (not figuratively, I mean literally) and soundness of mind.

I also have been thinking that maybe I should pull that .38 out of my purse...  oh wait, that's not me. That's Jax's Old Lady. Crap. I am losing a grasp on reality.

So there it is my first problem. And maybe that really is the get out of reality card I am playing at the moment. Not that my reality is too bad, but it ain't the best either. The thing is you don't know if a choice is the right one or not until after its made. And for me, I seem to be making a lot of life changing choices lately. So, I am always wondering what's next? Which brings me to the root of my stress... I am jobless, income-less in T-minus 3 weeks! YIKES!

It's a little disconcerting that a brilliant, multi-talented, and extremely modest individual such as myself has had no serious job offers as of to date. (I think, by most accounts, I could insert a "FML" after the last sentence, but I am no baby. I will pull up my big girl panties and carry on)

I am a skilled individual! (Just in case any potential job offerers are reading this, I am going to insert some of my vast array of capabilities here; Financial/Bookkeeping, Administrative, Management, Customer Service, Design & Marketing and most obviously a superior sense of the written word. I guess many of you could argue now that the most obvious attribute could, again, be my extreme modesty... I wouldn't argue after that last statement)

But in reality, who does a girl have to know to get a job?! Maybe this is why I have consistently created my own jobs in the past. I want to flip to the other side now. I am ready. I want to be the Employed and not the Employer. I swear to the heavens, it was never this hard to get a job with me!

Everyone keeps saying, when one door closes, another opens. I am beginning to think I may need a Winchester boy to pick the lock on that door for me. The damn thing is locked. I may resort to using my .38 to blow the lock off... oh crap, yeah there goes that reality again, sorry.

My reality may be slightly skewed at the moment, but I still know that I would be the best thing that ever happened to a business or organization. I am one smart cookie with a heck of a lot to offer. So if you know of someone that needs a talented individual, such as myself, to be in their employ, I am ready to go! I am ready, willing and able! So how about you call me maybe.


List of Characters....
Mr. Grey, the ever-so-handsome Dominant in 50 Shades of Grey, a novel by E.L James
Black Dagger Brotherhood, paranormal romance series, novels by J.R Ward
Jax Teller, the drop dead sexy lead character of the TV series Sons of Anarchy, portrayed by Charlie Hunnam
The Winchester Boys, the very attractive ghost hunting brothers of the TV series Supernatural, portrayed by Jared Padalecki and Jensen Ackles







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